thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
