He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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