Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
He kissed a someone with a penis
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Randomize
