I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
