I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
i drank out of a bidet.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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