Dual....:-)
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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