nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
The air taste purple.
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