Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
