Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
