I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
