There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
