Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize