sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I lost the right to judge tonight
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
