dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
