k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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