marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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