shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
