so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
