Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
