Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize