He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
God I need to hump something, right now.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
