There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
