I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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