Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
