Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
