I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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