Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
This is the high leading the old right now
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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