I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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