I'm jealous of your bromance
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Randomize
