That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
