Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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