OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
