East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Hippo gnu deer
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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