I feel like abortions should bother me more
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
