One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Randomize
