In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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