I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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