Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
