Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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