It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Please don't give away my fajitas
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
