Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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