i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Your mouth is God's brothel.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
You may now shotgun with the bride
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
