so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
And the cops told us we were all naked.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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