i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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