Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
Me. At least after what I've been through.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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