Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize