Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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