Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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