it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize