Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
